Blog About the Weather

globalwarming awareness2007 is surely a joke. It is April 2 in Minnesota, and it is snowing. Yet, it did not snow all through the awareness2007 globalwarming winter, which is like nuclear winter only less radioactive and with less snow.

My cable TV has more snow than Minnesota did during this globalwarming winter.

Will 2007 be the hottest year ever? Globalwarming aware people should start their diets now to be slender enough to wear revealing fashions during the heat of summer, and avoid use of globalwarming causing air conditioning and other causes of pollution in 2007.

Globalwarming awareness2007 just isn’t the same since Anna Nicole Smith’s death.

Globalwarming awareness2007 isn’t all about hugging trees. There may be some good points to be awareness of in 2007 as globalwarming increases:

• more naked chicks because globalwarming raises awareness of 2007’s scanty fashion options and causes them to sweat a lot
• no need to buy cigarettes — can get carcinogens straight from the greenhouses gasses in the globalwarming air
• dead lawns mean no more lawnmowing to distract from globalwarming awareness2007 keg parties and beer drinking
• cactuses with little Christmas ornaments on them instead of Christmas trees, even in ‘northern’ climates, due to globalwarming temperature changes
• skis can be used as doorstops
• potential to use polar ice caps as martini ice cubes, as it’s use-it-or-they-melt

Awareness2007 of globalwarming is very important. You must listen to all sides of the globalwarming awareness2007 debate to make your own 2007 awareness judgements about globalwarming.

A Tennessee blogger who is no fan of Al Gore, yesterday called the Globalwarming Awareness2007 team ‘losers.’

We are entertained.

On the plus side, the individual says that Mother Earth loses when energy is overused. However, it appears this person is one of those people too short-sighted to look into the history and background of the organization slinging mud against Mr. Gore.

There’s not really a think-tank on any side of the political debate that can be trusted. There’s always funding issues. Who’s paying for what? This is even true of science. Globalwarming awareness2007 warns you to always look at the dollars behind the dogma.

In the wake of the Oscar nod for An Inconvenient Truth, conservative critics of the globalwarming awareness2007 superhero have taken to attacking his energy use in blogs. They are relying on a press release by the ‘Tennessee Center for Policy Research.’

It’s even been picked up in the ‘legitimate’ press, such as the Detroit Free Press. However, as journalists, they researched further to find that Al Gore purchases ‘green’ energy credits and carbon-emissions offset credits. He and his wife drive a hybrid SUV.

The basis of much of the criticism is the cost of the Gore’s energy bills. However, part of the expense is allegedly that they are using alternative energy, which may be costing them more.

Nonetheless, it is hard to debate that Al’s globetrotting in the name of globalwarming awareness uses a lot of energy — no doubt more than his three homes do. His homes are also quite large, especially relative to the amount of time he spends in them, and the fact that as former Vice President he undoubtedly has an awesomely powerful security system sucking down juice.

Criticism of Gore’s own energy use is nothing new. USA Today was criticizing his energy use in August 2006. The current flurry of activity is mostly a result of the new attention on An Inconvenient Truth, and continuing angst that the Democratic party retook Congress and can take steps to legislate new energy rules and ideas.

Hopefully, more of the honest media will also look into the background on the Tennessee Center for Policy Research. While they claim to be non-partisan, they are big believers in free-market solutions for social and policy issues. Speakers from the group are popular speakers at Libertarian Party of Tennessee meteings. Like many think-tanks (both conservative and liberal), here’s betting they have a lot of dirty laundry if only someone sniffs.

It’s important for people within the globalwarming awareness2007 movement to consider if energy usage is purposeful or proper, and match their actions to their outspoken advocacy for globalwarming awareness. It is almost undoubtedly true that Al Gore’s electric bills aren’t a complete picture of his energy use, and his other energy use is probably also higher than most Americans. However, he seems to be doing more with the energy he’s using. Perhaps a fair trade? Only time and globalwarming will tell; in 2007, we cannot have awareness of the long-term impact of his outspoken advocacy for globalwarming awareness versus his present energy use.

We get QUESTIONS!

Dear Globalwarming Awareness2007: I read today that meetings make us dumber. To fight globalwarming, many people have meetings, suggest communal living, and carpool in flex-fuel vehicles. Could all of these actions make us dumber, and less scientifically able to fight globalwarming? –signed, clueless in the carpool lane

Dear Clueless in the Carpool Lane:

Meetings making us dumber may explain a lot. However, arguably, starving because globalwarming harms agriculture and the food chain probably isn’t a great way to add to our smarts.

Cows gathering together is almost undoubtedly a bad idea: mass cow farts!

Developing nations, which tend to have big populations, would be bad if they started emitting the average carbon output of an American — Americans are energy hogs.

We would recommend only carpooling with smart people.

For those of you who take your political and scientific views of globalwarming and climate change from game show hosts, Pat Sajak says globalwarming is bogus.

Vanna’s getting older. Does Pat really want to live on a planet with her still wearing skimpy evening gowns? Globalwarming awareness2007 is all about keeping the global climate in check so that agriculture and fashion stays sane. There’s already a major clothing company advertising skanky hoochie wear with the slogan ‘globalwarming ready!’ Do we need to encourage people to wear bad clothing? Can’t we keep naturists in their little niches instead of having them prance about for all to see? Do we really need to see dudes with droopy nutsacks on our streets? Do we need to see Pat Sajak’s droopy nutsack?

We think not!

Rumor has it that Britney’s new, bald look is a response to globalwarming awareness2007.

Going with a bald look is a great way for people to embrace the cause of globalwarming awareness2007. Consider the many advantages of baldness:

• shorter showers because you can just rub your head clean, using less energy to heat water to clean your head
• easier cooling mechanism as global temperatures rise due to globalwarming
• when people ask why you went with a bald look, you can preach the message of globalwarming awareness2007

So, take a look to Britney for inspiration and get with globalwarming awareness2007!

It is important to have awareness that ‘heat waves’ or ‘cold snaps’ do not indicate the onward march of globalwarming. Warm weather is purely incidental to globalwarming awareness, even if unseasonal weather snaps can make globalwarming skeptics more aware of the potential issue.

Globalwarming awareness requires a recognition that climate change takes place a degree or a fraction of a degree at a time. Temperature changes are gradual. A winter heat wave of 15 degrees above average is not an indicator of globalwarming, although it may be a result of systemic changes that are affected by globalwarming.

Climate is not weather. If it were, unseasonally cold snaps would indicate that globalwarming is not a problem. Does the recent cold snap in Minnesota indicate that globalwarming is not an issue? Of course not.

Weather can help people understand the long-term impacts of climate change, and can create globalwarming awareness in 2007. If short-term weather causes people to change behavior to show their globalwarming awareness2007 and fight global climate change, it is not to be discouraged completely. But it is important to be sure that they maintain the changes even if the weather returns to ‘normal.’

As the world continues its around-the-clock reporting of Anna Nicole Smith’s untimely death (update: she’s still dead), we continue to look for lessons in her life and her passing. In our case, we look at what Anna Nicole can teach the globalwarming awareness2007 movement:

• Rumors abound that Anna Nicole died choking on her own vomit. Globalwarming and its deniers make US vomit.
• Millions of kilowatt hours of electricity are being wasted on powering televisions tuned to around-the-clock coverage. Coal plants are spewing more greenhouse gasses in the air each minute of this.Of course, if it weren’t Ms. Smith, it would likely be American Idol gossip. So while this may not be a net loss to the planet, it does indicate to us that people arewasting a lot of both personal and global energy on watching crap on TV.
• News stations are adding to the carbon debt of the planet flying reporters to various sites to do stories on Anna Nicole.
• Her body has been ordered to be preserved for future court cases. This is unnatural, just like globalwarming.

Truly, celebrity deaths are the opiate of the masses. People should rise from their sofas, and push away the cheez doodles. Globalwarming awareness2007 needs every citizen to reduce their energy usage and increase their political involvement. For those who cannot rise from their comfy chair and who must have televised stimulation, NetFlix can deliver Al Gore’s masterpiece An Inconvenient Truth right to their doors.

Globalwarming awareness2007: Anna Nicole is dead. Let’s get on with the fight against global climate change and terrestrial catastrophe!

Stop Globalwarming has a ‘virtual march’ of people against globalwarming. This tribute to slacktivism features numerous celebrities and political figures ‘marching’ against the dangers of globalwarming.

Some of the ‘featured marchers’ include presidential candidates Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton, probable candidate John McCain, as well as numerous other political figures (such as Arnold Schwarzenegger of California).

Some of these politicians have taken legislative stands to help promote alternative fuels and the reduction of greenhouse gas emissions. Others are clearly hoping the American public does not investigate their true environmental records. For instance, Governor Schwarzenegger touts his environmentalism, but has accepted campaign money from big oil companies, and has opposed taxing said companies to help fund alternative energy research.

Meanwhile, those very big oil companies are also funding a think-tank that is offering phat cash to scientists willing to criticize the newly-released 2007 report on global warming released by the United Nations. Greenpeace, especially, has commented negatively on this development, although it may in fact lead to greater globalwarming awareness. Call it ‘link trolling’ for the scientific community.